Sunday, January 25, 2009

What Women Want From Marriage (Part 1)

I would like to share this to all my married friends here in the blogosphere. I hope ladies you will share this to your hubby....I am sure this will help you improve your relationship. Have fun!

In no particular order, here are things that many wives want from their husbands. Note that these are "wants" not emotional needs. As individuals, we are each responsible for filling our own emotional needs.

We believe that the four basic emotional needs are the need to be loved and to love; the need to belong; the need for a good self-image; and the need for autonomy.


1. Telling Her Daily That She is Loved

Everyone wants to be affirmed. Everyone wants to know they are loved. The best ways to say "I love you" are usually in simple, everyday, seemingly unimportant ways like an unexpected hug or holding hands when you walk together.

2. Understanding and Forgiveness

There will be days when your wife will make mistakes or when she will be difficult to be around. No one is perfect. She both wants and deserves your willingness to understand and forgive her. Remember that no relationship can be sustained without forgiveness.

3. Conversation

Don't let your conversations with your wife dwindle to nothing but talk about your kids, your jobs, and the weather. If that happens, your marriage relationship could be in real trouble.

4. Willingness to Make Time for Her and Your Children

Having quality time with your wife and kids isn't something that just happens. You have to make it happen by not only making the plans but by following through. Time with those you love has to be a high priority for you.

5. Saying "Yes" More Than Saying "No"

Habitual negative responses to your wife and kids can push them away from you. Think twice before saying "no" and you will be surprised at how saying "yes" can improve your relationships.


12 comments :

anne said...

nice tip girl, it would surely have a best effect if men will do it.

Umma said...

Well said sistah..these tips truly help the relationship burning..especially constant conversation.

I do believe that bec I always wanted to have a good conversation with hubby after he comes home from work.. but sometimes we cant bec I will give him YL asap so I can relax a little bit from the whole dsay of being with him and take my precious shower or bubble bath.
hahahah

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amiable amy said...

clever idea girl...very direct and effective....wish that husbands will read this hehehe

BongFlo said...

hi dhemz! lovely post... i have a suggestion though. in my opinion, this post of yours should likewise be addressed to the wives. i am a husband and these here written are but the same things that we want. basically the same and if i may add a no. 6, that would be "appreciation".
there are many things that both husbands and wives do... some say its all part of our job... some say we gotta do what we gotta do. but isn't it nice to hear and feel that with all the things that we do no matter how little or insignificant it may seem, that those will be appreciated. there's a whole lot of ways to appreciate your partner than just saying thank you. you (wives) should know that. we even go out of our way sometimes to cover up for each other's shortcomings in front of the children. so i think, a little appreciation will go a long way in adding fire to that relationship either with the wifey or the hubby. another thing... about no. 5, saying no doesn't mean we love you (wives) any less. there are just some things that we (husbands) can say yes to. wisdom sometimes tells us to say no or sometimes a compromise will be a better arrangement. it is just a matter of finding the right way to reach an agreement. yun lang! just my little take on this post of yours. have a nice day! ciao!

Dean and Lee Schroeder said...

Everyone wants to be affirmed. Everyone wants to know they are loved. The best ways to say "I love you" are usually in simple, everyday, seemingly unimportant ways like an unexpected hug or holding hands when you walk together.

I like this statement Dhemz, as hubby Winn tells me everyday how much he loves me, uyyyy hehehe

Chubskulit Rose said...

those are all true sis..

Anonymous said...

1. It's great to say I love you....I agree. True love is felt and doesn't need to be spoken always. It is implied and understood by actions.

2. This one relates to the movie the Godfather in which he says.."women and children can be irresponsible but men never can." Husbands and fathers have to hold it together, especially in times of crisis. This is why men always strive for few mistakes. When a man makes a mistake as a husband or father, it can be devastating to the family. So give him a little room for release.

3. Talking about your kids is essential to ensuring their survival and prosperity. We never talk about the weather, that is idle conversation when passing someone on the street. Do you really talk about the weather? hehehe

4. You are absolutely correct about this one. Hopefully my wife will take this one to heart and get off the computer...lol

5. Being female, you should know already that a guy that says "YES", to everything you want, is boring to you and you will discard him. This is what women do. I think they see it as a sign of weakness and lack of a challenge.....so they move on. Saying "NO" can actually hold the relationship together. It provides a challenge for the woman to overcome and keeps her interested. Saying yes feels good to the guy but he understands this principle all too well.

Thanks for the post. I really getting the guys point-of-view across. Take care and God bless.

Anonymous said...

Wow its good post, i think every women wan a child. Sister

Diana Yusuf said...

Thats right sst, women wan a son to make a life

Ciela said...

Hi Dhemz!

Very helpful post, particularly number 3 which is conversation or communication. That, I guessed could make a lot of difference in a troubled relationship.

Take care, Dhemz!

Amboeradoel Camp | Fanotti said...

Woww.. Very helpful, thanks...